Monday, November 29, 2010

Opposites attract - curiosity or completion?

The old concept and expression "opposites attract" has existed for centuries. And it seems to be very
applicable when it comes to love & relationships.
Research has shown that people are usually attracted to their opposite gender on a scale of extraverted / introversion and judgement / perceiving.
We are naturally attracted to people who are different from ourselves - and therefore somewhat exciting.

But really how far we are willing to go in this exciting journey to an unknown? Is curiosity a way to  excuse our "unfounded" attractions?

But it's not just the exciting differences which attract us to our opposites, it is also a natural looking, if not primitive, for completeness. We are naturally attracted to individuals who have strengths that we are missing.
When two opposites work as a couple, they become a better functioning rounded unit.  A good example of this may be the two fundamental concepts in Chinese philosophy and culture, yin and yang.  Yin literally translates as "the dark, slope (hill) north bank (river) south, cloudy, gloomy. Is the dark element: it is sad, passive, sober, feminine, introverted, intimate, and corresponds to the night. Yang means "sunny place, slope (hill) southern bank (river) north, sun shine." The light element, is happy, full of vitality, active, bright, masculine, and corresponds to the day. Yin is often symbolized by water and earth, while Yang is symbolized by fire and wind.
There is also the theory that our natural attraction to the opposite is a way for our subconscious to force us to deal with matters of our own worst natures. Being very attracted to our opposites, two opposites involved in an intimate relationship have significant issues and communication barriers to overcome. So in a sense, our attraction to the opposite personality can be seen as our subconscious mind that leads us to become a complete individual, causing us to deal with areas that are most difficult to tackle for us.

Not the same can be said for other types of relationships. When it comes to work, colleagues, or friends, we are especially interested in having to deal with people who are very different from ourselves.
We seem to feel most comfortable with people who have similar interests and perspectives, and we show a special motivation or patience to relate to our opposites.

It's like watching free movies without knowing you are playing in too, different ways to approach the same issue, having a relationship, not only based on sex, but searching for the missing exciting pieces to fill the "set".

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Relationships - filling the missing piece or adding value to what it already is?

 When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.

The story of the missing piece is timeless and simple.  A soul that has been created and fit for life in a particular way awakes one day dissatisfied, dissatisfied and sad.  Something is wrong.  Something is askew.  Something is missing

The things of God’s kingdom are love and equity, the equity that says there is enough; enough food, enough shelter, enough dignity, enough hope for everyone.  What will fill you up, what will serve to be your missing piece now found, is the gift of a relationship with God and with yourself, a relationship that based on love and made perfect by God’s love; a relationship that results in you and me being so filled that we have love to share and can show the world all of the good things God has always intended, all of the good things, God has in store. 

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But how many of us are actually really pleased with ourselves? 

It's all about the importance of developing your individuality before getting into a relationship, not sacrificing yourself in order to get into a relationship, and then maintaining that individuality while in the relationship.


Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Likes and dislikes

I like..
Hot, sunny days.
The way roses smell.
The way it smells after a rainstorm.
Being up late at night.

  • Sunrises and sunsets.
  • Real people.
  • Lightning storms.
  • Rainbows.
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What about you? :)